The Collision
by mrschultz
Summary: Tony/Loki established relationship, post Avengers. Car accident. Serious injuries. Drama.
1. Chapter 1

I wrote this for a new friend, but I'm nervous that it's complete shit. Welcome to my lab, guinea pigs! Seriously though, if you take the time to read this, please review and let me know what you think. It's only the start, but I can't decided if I want to keep going or start over. Thanks and thanks again!

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Loki was sitting in the library, curled up with a book that Tony had recommended, 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy'. It was a bit tedious and dull, but Loki persisted because he was tired of misunderstanding Tony's references. He hated pop culture, but Tony loved it. And so Loki was trying to drink in all the culture he could, and he was forcing Tony to broaden his horizons, so to speak. They weren't trying to change each other; they were trying to change themselves, so that they would fit better together. Things hadn't always gone smoothly for the two of them, considering the first and second times they met they were trying to kill each other, so even the smallest of milestones was to be congratulated.

And it was pleasant, for Loki, to have someone for whom he wanted to change. He had always tried to change himself to please others, but had never succeeded; he always fell short. With Tony, change was not required, and that made Loki want to do his very best to be the man that Tony deserved. Yes, Tony was vulgar and crude, and he was narcissistic and self-absorbed, but Loki was also narcissistic, and he used flowery words and phrasing to cloak his vulgarity. Together, they were a very dangerous team. But they also served to keep each other in check. It was a delicate balance, to be sure. And Nick Fury was placing a strain on their already tense relationship by constantly demanding Loki to help with his schemes. Fury seemed to think that, even though Loki had served his Asgardian sentence for his crimes, Loki still owed a debt to this realm. It was becoming more and more difficult to avoid Fury and his requests.

Loki was reading in the library because Tony was out on a SHIELD mission. Usually Loki liked to go along to keep an eye on things, not to be overprotective of his partner, but Fury had been so irritating the last time that Loki swore never to step foot on SHIELD property again. He was so sick of dealing with them, that he would rather sit home and worry about Tony than put up with them to be there if something happened. Of course, the rest of the team would be able to help if something did happen, Loki told himself. Nothing to be worried about. Or so he thought.

Tony was laughing, and it was pissing Natasha off. They were in the middle of a fight, and no matter how confident he might be, she thought, Tony really needs to show a little more discretion. As she and Hawkeye took out the last five of the smaller doombots, Tony watched as Thor took his time finishing the leader with a flourish. Once they were sure the battle was over, SHIELD agents swarmed onto the scene, collecting data and beginning the arduous process of cleaning up. Sometimes they required the help of the avengers, but not today. It was a pretty straightforward clear up and haul away. So Tony suggested that they all go out for pizza.

"How are you always hungry?" Asked Natasha, still annoyed with his careless behavior earlier.

"How are you not starving? I mean, that catsuit, while distractingly sexy, doesn't leave much room for junk food." Tony replied casually. He removed his armor and placed it carefully in the trunk of the Aston Martin he had driven that day.

"Hey, can we not talk about eating habits right now? That battle may not have been a challenge, but an easy fight like that usually means worse is on the horizon. Now unless you want to go back to headquarters and do it for us, Natasha and I have to report back to Fury." Clint said, hoping to stop the comments from turning into a full-fledged argument. The last thing they needed was tension between team members.

"I will return to Jane, farewell friends." Thor said in his stoic voice. He swung his hammer a few times and launched into the sky. Tony rolled his eyes, wishing he could do the same. But he had stubbornly decided to take his car out for a spin today, so he had to drive it home before he could take a joy ride in his suit. He gave a short wave to Clint and Natasha as they walked away, before climbing into his car and taking off at a speed that was probably not legal. He had intended to head straight home, but he found the driving soothing to his tense state. He wasn't sure why, but all of his team members were getting on his nerves lately. They all claimed to be accepting of his relationship with Loki, but he knew they would never understand. The amount of silent judgment he received from them was becoming intolerable. It was always worse when Loki wasn't there. They might not like him, but at least Loki's intimidating presence kept them from making snide remarks.

Tony sighed and stretched his neck, trying to relax the sore muscles there. He hit the accelerator as he entered the highway, heading out of the city. He just needed to drive a little to clear his head. He wasn't being _that _reckless, right? The speedometer edged past 100. Tony turned up the AC/DC, enjoying the calming feeling of doing something so ordinary. It had been weeks since he had driven anything, and while he loved flying with the suit, it was an entirely different kind of rush than speeding down the road in a beautiful car, passing other drivers and taking turns at dangerous speeds. He loved the sound of the tires slipping against the pavement, the growl of the engine as it accelerated out of the corners, the white noise of the wind rushing past. Plus, the speakers in his car had better bass than the helmet. That didn't hurt, either. Tony was suddenly distracted as his rearview lit up with blue and red. 'Shit.' Tony sighed. He really didn't want to deal with an officer right now, his snarky tongue always seemed to make things worse when he was already in a bad mood. Figuring he could probably outrun the cop, he pressed the accelerator all the way to the floor and tightened his grip on the wheel. Just as the police car started to disappear in the distance, Tony decided to show off a little. He started weaving between the other vehicles on the highway, cutting people off but being careful not to lose control. Unfortunately, the other drivers were not as skilled. Just as he was sliding in behind a minivan, attempting to cross behind it before passing it in the far right lane, the driver of the minivan hit his brakes and started pulling into the right lane, directly into Tony's path. He slammed his brakes on hard, and tried to avoid the collision, but he turned a little too sharply and felt his tires leave the road. The next thing he knew, he was laying on the roof of his upside down car, smelling burnt rubber and gasoline. His head was pounding, and there was something wet and sticky all over his head and chest. He looked around, seeing at least five other cars that had been wrecked. He tried to move to climb out of his car, but there was a tugging on his leg. He looked down to realize his foot was pinned between the headrest of the driver's seat and the dented roof. He pulled again, and this time he felt a shooting pain up his leg. He was stuck. He started sucking in deep breaths, and felt the panic settle in. He closed his eyes and thought of Loki to try and calm himself down.

That was when he remembered that Loki hadn't come to observe the fight that day, and didn't know where Tony was. Nobody did. Tony thumped the back of his head against the car roof beneath him in frustration, before remembering how much his head hurt. He grimaced and reached up to feel the damage to his scalp. He pulled his hand away to find it covered in blood. 'That's definitely not a good sign,' he thought. He tried to assess the damage to the rest of him, but he was getting lightheaded and dizzy. Each movement seemed to become more difficult, and he wondered briefly if that wetness he felt pooling around him was his own blood. That was his last thought before he passed out.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so no one told me the first chapter was terrible, but I'm still unsure. All I know is that I don't believe Loki is a weak helpless being, so it's difficult to write his side of this. Please, if you would be so kind, review and tell me what you think! I would adore hearing your thoughts. Thanks in advance for reading, you're the bestest!

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Loki sighed as he finished the book. The ending, while predictable, was still enjoyable; but Loki would never admit that to Tony. Yes, he was that petty. He stretched and stood, leaving the library in favor of the kitchen. He was just pulling the leftovers from the fridge for a snack when he heard a vague ringing.

"Sir, your mobile is ringing. It is on the nightstand, should I put it on speaker for you?" Asked Jarvis.

"No, that's alright I will get it myself. No need to be as lazy as Tony." Loki replied to the AI. He was always joking about how Tony built robots to do everything for him. It didn't matter of course, Tony kept himself in fantastic shape. His thoughts drifted to Tony's excellent figure. _Right, getting the phone_. Loki reminded himself. He wandered leisurely to the bedroom, sure that it was just Tony calling to let him know the fight was over. Tony always invited Loki to the traditional after battle meal with the team, which Loki always refused. One thing Tony never understood was why Loki spent so much energy avoiding Thor. Yes, the oaf was annoying, but somehow Thor's giant blind spot for Loki's faults made Loki feel angry and guilty the same time. Tony, never having had a sibling to compare himself to, didn't understand the complicated relationship. So Loki eventually stopped trying to explain it to Tony, but still tried to avoid any group events with the Avengers. No need to tell Tony that Loki was actually avoiding the rest of the group, as well. Clint was as reluctant to forgive Loki as Thor was eager.

By the time he reached the phone, the caller had left a message. He dialed and held the phone to his ear without checking who had called. He was surprised to hear Fury's deep tone on the message instead of Tony. He immediately felt a pang of worry in his stomach. Why would the director be calling him?

"Loki, this is Fury. The battle was a success, but Tony took off after the battle, and we have some new information and need to debrief him. He won't pick up the phone, as usual. I'm assuming he's with you, so make sure he calls in, and soon." Fury sounded short and terse as always. Loki pulled the phone away from his head and looked at it in confusion. He checked his missed calls to make sure Tony hadn't called. If the team hadn't gone out for food, why hadn't Tony come straight home? More importantly, why hadn't Tony called? Loki hated worrying like this, his paranoia was getting the better of him. Before he could freak out, he tried Tony's cell. Straight to voicemail. Okay, so maybe Tony was going out for drinks to blow off some steam, and his phone battery died. It had been known to happen. Loki rolled his eyes and tried to think of someway to reach him.

"Jarvis? Is Tony still in his suit?" Loki asked the AI.

"No, sir." Was the reply. Loki sighed. _I'm sure everything's fine, no reason to panic._ He tried to reassure himself. That panicky feeling in his stomach just wouldn't go away.

"Is there any other way to track him?"

"Sorry sir, the tracking mechanism on the suit was disabled for repairs, and his phone is currently untraceable." Jarvis stated calmly.

"Untraceable?" Loki questioned, unsure what that meant.

"The phone is currently off, and I am unable to connect to turn it on. Apologies." The bad feeling in Loki's stomach was spreading, and he was starting to genuinely worry. He needed to do something; he couldn't just stand around and wait. He didn't care if he was overreacting, because if Tony thought he could just not call after an avengers battle and disappear, Loki needed to remind him that he wasn't on his own anymore. It was about time Tony started taking their relationship seriously.

Loki left the tower and hailed a cab. He started scouting out Tony's favorite bars, looking for the familiar head of short dark hair. He had searched five different businesses, stopping for a drink or two maybe, when he really started to get annoyed. Tony sometimes disappeared when he was feeling mopey and depressed, but he always answered his phone. Loki had called and texted several times, and he constantly checked his phone, hoping that somehow Tony would have responded. Nothing. He left the closest bar to the location of the avengers earlier conflict, and he was out of ideas. He decided to head back to the tower to wait. Eventually, Tony would stumble back home, and Loki would have to wait for him to sober up before lecturing him anyway. All he could hope was that this time, Tony wouldn't be dragging some tramp with him. The bruises on Tony's body from the last time that happened were almost healed. Loki was not usually abusive, but that night Tony had been particularly belligerent. To be fair, Tony had started the fight, but he was too drunk for any of his punches to connect with the target. Loki had apologized afterwards for his temper getting the better of him, and they had had fantastic makeup sex. However, if Tony thought he could make that same mistake again, Loki wouldn't be so quick to let it go this time.

Once Loki was back at the tower, the tension that had been building all evening in his gut faded, replaced by a bit of boredom. He had been in this situation before, and he hated waiting. But just like before, it would work out. He tried to push the worry from his mind by making himself comfortable on the couch with a drink and turning on some movie. He couldn't focus on it, and once the panicked feeling faded, thanks in part to the alcohol, exhaustion set in. Though he never admitted it even to himself, he always worried when Tony went out on avengers business. Between the battle and Tony's failure to communicate, he had been worrying about Tony for most of the day, and it was a stressful occupation. Before long, he had drifted into a fitful to sleep on the couch.

He woke up feeling sore from sleeping in such an uncomfortable position, and confused. It was a full minute before his mind caught up, and he remembered what had happened the day before. He blinked and looked around. Tony wasn't a quiet drunk, so it wasn't possible that Tony had gotten home and snuck in without waking him. Just to be sure, he checked the bedroom. The bed was empty. Loki asked Jarvis if Tony had returned to the tower. Jarvis informed him that there was no sign of Tony anywhere. Loki's worry from the day before returned, and it had doubled overnight.

~Meanwhile~

Tony gasped as he woke up, and tried to focus against the bright lights blinding him. His face was covered in an uncomfortable plastic mask. He tried to reach up to pull it off, but his hands were heavy, weighted down and restricted. His head was pounding, and it felt like every hangover he had ever had was back to haunt him. In short, he hurt. A lot. To distract himself from the pain, he tried to remember how he had gotten here, wherever that was. The last thing he could remember was fighting with the avengers, and trading quips with Natasha, and then…nothing. He couldn't remember how he had gotten home from the battle. Had he gotten home? He didn't even remember calling Loki, and that was always the first thing he did after a fight. Loki, where was he? Tony knew that Loki should be here. Why wasn't he? He looked around him to see if maybe he had just missed Loki's lanky figure. The room, a generic hospital room, was empty of any other inhabitant. Before he could worry about it too much, a nurse walked in.

Tony tried to ask her where he was, but his tongue was just as heavy as his hands. All that came out was a garbled sort of moan. At least it did manage to call the nurses attention to the fact that he was awake. She looked surprised.

"Oh, you're up! Well we weren't expecting you to be conscious for another few hours. Let me get that mask off for you." She pulled the stiff plastic away from his face and off his head, setting it off to the side. "Now, can you speak? You are on a lot of painkillers right now, so don't panic if you feel groggy or disoriented." She was speaking very calmly, and it was making Tony feel all the more agitated. Where the hell was Loki? Why wasn't she calling Loki in here, wasn't the bastard even concerned about him? He tried to speak again.

"Wurrrszzlnnnkee" he slurred, sounding more like a drunk than an angry genius. She gave him a very gentle smile.

"Okay, don't worry. We're going to take care of you. You should try to get some rest for now, the police are working on your identification, so hopefully the next time you wake up, someone will be here waiting for you. I'll call the doctor, he'll be able to at least tell you what happened. She left the room, and Tony felt more confused than ever. Did she just say the police were identifying him? Was he a suspect? No, that wasn't right, they identified a suspect _before_ they caught him. Tony was already here, which meant they hadn't identified who he was yet. Which meant he was the victim. He was still feeling overwhelmingly confused and trying to sort through the nurse's words when the doctor walked in.

"Good evening, sir. Or I guess good morning is more accurate, it's just after 1am. So you were in a pretty severe car accident yesterday afternoon, which is why you're here. You were in critical condition when they transported you from the scene. We had to perform emergency surgery, which went successfully, and now you're in Sacred Heart Hospital. You've woken up significantly early from the anesthesia, so the drugs in your system will probably be a little more than is comfortable. The important thing is, your injuries were treatable, and you're in stable condition. It's a minor miracle, considering the severity of the crash. Unfortunately, your vehicle was completely destroyed, and we were unable to find any kind of identification on your person. For now, I suggest you rest and try to sleep. In a few hours we will have more information on your prognosis, and hopefully the sedatives will be out of your system. By then you should be able to tell us who you are, eh?" The doctor joked half-heartedly. Tony didn't like him. The doctor hadn't yet made eye contact with Tony. He had been gazing tiredly at Tony's chart the entire time he was speaking, like he was just reading it out. He mindlessly spoke a few phrases of reassurance before replacing the chart on the wall and walking out, leaving Tony alone again. He sighed and let his head fall back onto his pillow. He should be feeling something, but between the drugs and the pain, all he could think about was how sad, no, angry he was that Loki wasn't there. Leave it to Loki to not look for him. He was still brooding over Loki's lack of presence when he passed back out from the sedatives.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys! This chapter got a little out of control, I'm not entirely happy with it. I fear that rewriting it will not end well, though. I hate editing and usually when I'm forced to edit something, I end up changing it entirely. Hopefully, you all like how this goes. Review, please! I'm a starving artist and your words are my sustenance!

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The first thing Loki did was to check his phone. Three times. There was nothing from Tony, no messages, no calls, no evidence that Tony had tried to contact him at all. From Fury however, there were two voicemails and several missed calls. Obviously Fury hadn't gotten the point that Loki was ignoring him. Loki growled at the phone in frustration. 'I swear, the first thing I'm going to do when I find that man is strangle him!' He was angry at Tony for disappearing, of course, but disappearing and leaving Loki to deal with Fury? Totally unjustifiable. He sighed and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He decided that before he could really start hunting down the billionaire playboy, he needed breakfast. After a quick bowl of oatmeal and some tea, he asked Jarvis to find anything he could to trace Tony, and search the news for anything suspicious. He was going to be thorough, because chances were Tony was somewhere ridiculous, like Vegas, or an alleyway. It really was a pain in the ass, having a reckless drunk for a boyfriend.

After commanding Jarvis to do all the work, Loki began to pace. He was fighting the anxiety, trying to hold on to the anger. He needed to show Tony that this was not ok, buy being angry. He didn't need to reward Tony's irresponsibility by worrying about him, and missing him, right? The more Loki thought about it, the less sure he was. He and Tony had been 'dating', as Tony referred to it, for about six months, and in that time Tony had been remarkably considerate and thoughtful, completely unlike his public image. In fact, Loki had felt guilty sometimes for not returning all of Tony's romantic gestures in kind. At first, Loki thought the playboy was mocking him with the flowers and the constant texts, but Pepper, Tony's only _real_ ex assured Loki that Tony was a die-hard romantic when it came to serious relationships. That was how Loki discovered they were in a serious relationship. He had merely been enjoying their physical compatibility, but Tony's attempts at courting were not unwelcome. Six months after that little chat with Pepper, and now the two most powerful and fallible men in the world, possibly the entire universe, were sharing more than just a bed.

So, Tony was a good boyfriend. Maybe this one slip-up didn't have to be the end of the world. It was definitely forgivable, so long as Tony was appropriately contrite for not telling Loki where he was. But something was tugging at Loki's peace of mind, telling him that this wasn't Tony being forgetful. He tried to push the thought away, but once he had acknowledged it, the fear of something horrible happening took over. Loki felt himself beginning to panic, so he asked Jarvis if there were any results.

"Nothing conclusive yet, sir. Though there is a John Doe at a hospital just outside the city, and his physical description fits."

Loki's heart skipped a few beats.

"Wouldn't they know if it was Tony? I mean, his face is pretty recognizable, and he is a celebrity, yes?" Loki's fear and worry were causing his voice to tremble a bit.

"I'm sorry sir, but the description of the patient indicates that he suffered several severe facial contusions, making facial identification unlikely." Loki placed a shaking hand over his eyes, swallowed to brace himself, and asked Jarvis for more details on the John Doe. He desperately hoped he was wrong, but it seemed just the thing that karma, or whatever force the universe had, would deem worthy to subject Loki to.

"The John Doe was in a multi-vehicle pileup on the interstate, heading west. There were several injuries, but only the John Doe was severe. He also appears to have been the cause of the accident sir. He was driving a grey Aston Martin, and he was apparently driving at reckless speeds-"

"Enough." Loki knew. Tony had taken his car yesterday, his grey Aston Martin, and he was just stupid enough to get into a car wreck. 'I mean really, what super heroes actually get in a car wreck?' Loki tried to calm himself by thinking of the ridiculousness of the situation. Tony was alive, that was what mattered. He had Jarvis send the info on Tony to his phone, and had Happy drive him there. He didn't want to wait for a taxi, and his hands weren't steady enough to get him there on his own. It was twenty minutes before they pulled into the parking lot of the hospital, and in that time Loki's anxiety had skyrocketed. He had started imagining all sorts of scenarios, in which Tony lost his memory, or Tony's near-death experience caused him to realize what a waste of time Loki was. It was not a pleasant ride for Loki, because his mind didn't seem to be able to provide any positive outcomes. He jumped from the car before Happy had even slowed the car, and raced to the front desk. He panted out Tony's name before he remembered that they hadn't identified him yet. He asked, tersely, for the John Doe from the car accident. The nurse looked supremely confused.

"First you think we have _the_ Tony Stark, then you demand to see a patient? You could try asking nicely." She said in a whiny voice, turning away to place a folder behind her. Loki glared at the back of her head, internally battling his desire to smash her face into the desk. 'No, that would be counter-productive.' He reminded himself.

"Look, miss, I have reason to believe that your John Doe _is _ Tony Stark, and if you don't let me see him this minute, I will unleash the Avengers – " he was cut off by her laughter.

"Oh my god, is this a joke? Am I on a TV Show? That is hilarious, really, but I don't think it's appropriate." Loki gaped at the woman's vapidity.

"Excuse me, did you say were looking for the John Doe that came in yesterday?" Said a kind voice from Loki's right. He looked down at the nurse, trying to reign in his anger. 'Counter-productive,' he repeated, though it little to quell his rage. "I'm the nurse that admitted him, I can take you to his room. I have to warn you, his face is pretty torn up, but he should be awake soon, and maybe he will recognize you. I'm assuming you're family?" She asked, not unkindly.

"Yes." Loki replied stiffly. He was still aggravated by the attitude of the woman at the desk, but this nurse was kind and was helping him. He took a deep breath as they entered the elevator. She smiled at him as he turned, but he did not notice.

"I don't know if this is the right sentiment," She started, sounding unsure, "But I hope he is the person you're looking for. He's in rough shape, and he could really use a familiar face. It's always traumatic to wake up in a hospital, but you know, it's so much worse if you're alone." Loki sniffed, and tried to ignore her incessant babbling. Somehow, he managed to process her words, despite his best efforts to ignore her. He remembered why he was here. For Tony. Tony, the only good thing to belong entirely to him, apart from his magic. Tony, who had spared his life, and probably saved it on several occasions. Without Tony, Loki knew he would never have found any sort of happiness, and now he might lose it all. The adrenaline fueled anger was fading into hopelessness. The nurse must have noticed Loki's expression, because she placed a small warm hand on his shoulder.

"No matter what happens when we get there, its important to remember that he's going to be okay. He's got a long recovery ahead of him, but he's already out of ICU, so he's made enormous progress in less than 24 hours." The elevator doors opened, and she removed her hand from his shoulder. "Are you ready? He's just down this hall." She stepped from the elevator and led Loki to one of the many identical doors in the seemingly endless hallway.

Without anger to fuel him, Loki was left feeling completely overwhelmed. He had a sudden feeling of panic, that he shouldn't be here, he should have called Tony's team mates instead. For all the arguments and makeup sex that the two had been through, Tony and Loki had never been through anything like this, and Loki was unsure if Tony would even want him there. Taking another deep breath, Loki stepped through the door the nurse was holding open. He slowly took in the figure lying on the bed, hooked up to seemingly endless machines. He didn't even need to see the face. It was Tony. He recognized the hands, Tony's calloused hands. And Tony's messy dark hair crushed against the stiff pillow. Loki knew it was him. And as he took in the damaged face, he felt the tears start to form in his eyes. It was Tony, his Tony, and he was laying here in this hospital bed because Loki couldn't take care of him. He could have protected him, could have prevented all this, if only he had been there. A wave of guilt washed over him, washing away all other emotions, and taking his strength with it.

Loki felt the nurse grab his shoulder and steer him to a chair next to the bed. He couldn't feel his feet, and he collapsed into the chair clumsily. The tears were beginning to blur his vision.

"Tony, Tony….please." Loki said softly, running his long pale fingers through the dark hair. He didn't even know what he was asking for. "Tony, no. Please, no." He felt the first tear fall just as Tony's eyes opened.


	4. Chapter 4

Okay, so I was going to wait longer and hope for more responses, but whatever. Most of you seemed to think that it wasn't worth going back and changing the story, so I am grateful I don't have to rewrite because I forgot about the arc reactor in Tony's chest. I did, however, manage to come up with an alternative. Without changing anything I've already written, I can explain how things happened. It's not the most brilliant scheme, but if you're here for a genius plot with depth and intricacies, you're in the wrong place. If you're here for the angst, you're in for a treat. ) Anyway, thanks for bearing with me and putting up with my idiocy.

As always, I love to hear your thoughts and feedback, so please review! Love you all!

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Tony woke up slowly, fading into consciousness. The first thing he noticed was how stiff he felt. Like he'd been drinking and passed out for 12 hours. Not a comfortable feeling. He heard Loki's voice, but couldn't understand what was being said. Loki sounded sad. Tony tried to open his eyes, but the lights were burning. It was so bright, and he knew he wasn't home. He would never have lights that bright when he was hung over. He blinked a few times to try and clear his vision, and that's when he realized how much his face hurt. He grimaced.

"Tony, what were you thinking?" Loki asked quietly. Tony was confused.

"What happened?" Tony replied with a question, which he knew always annoyed Loki. Sure enough, Loki gave an annoyed sigh.

"You don't remember. You were an idiot, and decided to drive off and try to kill yourself in a car accident."

"I'm sure it wasn't as dramatic as all that, Loki." He shifted to get more comfortable, and felt a shooting pain in his leg. He gasped at the pain, and Loki's face grew concerned.

"You're in too much pain. I'm calling the doctor." Tony realized then that he was in the hospital. Maybe Loki wasn't exaggerating that much. He nodded to Loki, thinking that pain medication sounded good right about now. It seemed like as he was waking up, every part of his body was starting to hurt. He could feel the sharp, shooting pain in his leg, the stinging cuts on his face, and a throbbing, burning across his chest. To distract himself, he looked at Loki.

"You were crying." Tony acknowledged the tears still on Loki's face. They were quickly brushed away, but the concern was still evident in Loki's expression.

"Never. I was certainly pissed that you didn't call after the fight, though. When you're feeling better I'm going to have to punish you for your idiocy." Loki's light words made Tony smile. He knew everything would be okay.

When the doctor came in, she cleared her throat and spoke without looking up from Tony's chart.

"Well, Mr. Stark, it looks like you're going to make a full recovery, but it's going to be a long road to recovery for you. We reset your leg, and stitched up the lacerations to your face and head, and bandaged the rest of your wounds. Thankfully, there was no damage to the metal contraption in your chest. Director Fury informed us about that, very interesting. We do need to keep you here for a few days to make sure everything starts healing well, but after that you'll be able to go home. You will need to stay off that leg for a few weeks, and I would recommend you take it easy for the next few months. The nurses will instruct you on how to change your bandages, and unless you have any questions, we will get you some more pain meds so you can relax." The doctor finished, looked up to smile briefly at Tony, and turned around and left.

"Okay, so that was informative." Tony scoffed. Loki crossed his arms and frowned. He was not a fan of this doctor. Before they could continue their conversation, the nurse came in. The nurse was much friendlier, but not any more forthcoming with answers to their questions. She quickly checked over Tony's injuries and administered the medication before she left in a hurry. As soon as the meds were in his IV, Tony started feeling drowsy. He fell asleep quickly, thinking about Loki.

Once he was asleep, Loki picked up his phone. He listened to the messages from Fury that he had earlier ignored. He listened as Fury explained that Tony had been in a serious car accident. The other messages that Fury had left told Loki where Tony was and detailed Tony's condition. Loki, instead of being glad that Fury had called him, grew confused as to why Fury had known where Tony was. He was still staring at his phone when Pepper came in. She looked up from her tablet as she entered and looked at Loki.

"Hello, we were wondering when you were going to get here. Fury said he called you. Where have you been?" she asked Loki, who stared blankly at her. Why wasn't she concerned over Tony's condition, why hadn't she been there when Tony woke up?

"What?" Was all that Loki could manage to say.

"Haven't you been talking to Fury? He said he would tell you, so I assumed you would come here." She sat down on the other side of Tony's bed from Loki, who stood up from his chair. His anger was beginning to rise.

"Fury knew, you knew. Why did the hospital say he was a John Doe? Why wouldn't they allow me to see him?" He started shouting, causing Tony to stir. Pepper was looking uncomfortable. She and Loki had never been on the best terms, and he felt like she had purposely kept him out of the loop, even though he knew, logically, that she wouldn't stoop that low.

"Loki, didn't you talk to Fury? He decided, we decided to keep his identity secret so we wouldn't have to deal with the media frenzy on this one. The hospital staff were told not to give out Tony's name to anyone! Look, I don't know what you were told, but Fury said-"

"Well Fury didn't tell me anything!" Loki's anger was taking over now, and he was pissed at Pepper and Fury, even though he knew it was his own damn fault for ignoring the messages. "Why the hell did Fury know, why did you know, and not me? Why didn't anyone else try to call me, why wasn't I told?!" A nurse rushed in as he shouted, trying to calm him down. She was muttering something about sleeping patients, but Loki was too pissed to listen. "No! I will not calm down! You all think your secrecy is so damn important, what if I hadn't been here when Tony woke up!? What if he had died, and no one told me! What if, what if I,-" Loki screamed. The nurse just looked panicked, but Pepper tried to calm him down.

"Look, Loki, we all assumed you would get Fury's messages! We thought you knew, otherwise we would have tried to contact you. Think about it Loki, why would we want to keep this secret from you?" She tried to argue, hoping he would see that they weren't lying to him. He just shook his head, denying the truth, because it was easier to believe that they had kept this from him on purpose. He stormed out of the room without looking at anyone. The nurse looked shell-shocked, and Pepper, had a hand over her mouth in fear and surprise. She didn't trust Loki, and she knew Loki being that angry didn't bode well for anyone.

After leaving the hospital, Loki took a taxi back to the tower. He just wanted to think, to understand why Fury and Pepper, why all of SHIELD knew about Tony's accident before he did. He was pacing back and forth, trying to find any other reason why it could be, but he knew why. He wasn't important enough to Tony. If Tony really cared about him, Tony would have made sure that Loki was informed when something like this happened. Tony obviously cared more about his SHIELD colleagues than about his partner. The thought boiled in Loki, making him feel sick with anger and pain. He had been so innocent, so naïve to think that Tony actually felt the same way he did. This was why he never wanted to be honest with people, because that gave them the opportunity to screw him over like this. He preferred to work alone, because having team mates meant that those people could stab you in the back. Loki's anger festered and grew the more he thought about it, and he was never good at dealing with strong emotions.

After taking out some of his rage on Tony's possessions, nothing important just some decorations around the tower, Loki decided the only sensible course of action. He started packing. He wanted to stay, to exact revenge on Tony and the rest of them for treating him like he didn't matter, for using him and letting him think they cared. He wanted to, but he wouldn't. He would leave, and give himself time to plot a proper revenge. If he was going to make them realize their mistake, he was going make them wish they hadn't been so careless, that they hadn't taken advantage of him. It would seem they had forgotten what a formidable enemy he could be, and he needed to remind them. So he packed the few possessions that he had, which basically amounted to some weapons and a few clothes, because everything else had been a gift from Tony. He couldn't bring anything with him that reminded him of the man who had caused him so much pain. Once he had all his things neatly stored, he walked to the elevator, taking one last look at Tony's penthouse before the doors closed in front of him.

He was just going to leave the tower and disappear, but unfortunately Pepper had contacted Thor, the idiot. He was waiting in the lobby of the tower, blocking Loki's escape. Loki cursed. He really did not want to listen to Thor's moronic excuses right now.

"Brother, the lady Potts has informed me that you were upset when you left the hospital. I have only just heard what happened to Tony Stark, and I am sorry for how you discovered this. Please brother-" Loki cut him off with a violent hand gesture.

"I am NOT your brother, you fool. And you would do well to let me go." Loki threatened in his most menacing voice. Thor stepped back, shocked at the level of Loki's anger. Loki brushed past him and left. As Loki climbed into the cab, his mind was buzzing. He was going to make all of them regret their mistake, but Tony would learn exactly how wrong he had been, thinking he could take advantage of a god.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello! So, I didn't get any reviews from the last chapter, so I hope that doesn't mean you are all mad at me for the direction it went. If you are, I'm sorry, but here's another chapter, hopefully this one is better. Thanks for reading, and please review! I love it when you do!

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After his brief encounter with Loki, Thor went to the hospital to visit Tony. He needed to know why his brother was so upset. If Tony had said something to upset Loki, Thor was determined to make Tony apologize. And learn not to make that mistake again. Thor had not been altogether happy when Tony and Loki started their relationship, given Tony's history with 'relationships' and the fact that they were both given to recklessness. He had argued with both men, trying to make them see reason, but in the end they were both to stubborn to listen, and Thor could do nothing. He simply hoped that he was wrong, and their relationship wouldn't end badly. It had to end eventually, and now Thor thought that day had come.

He stalked into Tony's room, briefly glad that he had thought to leave the hammer behind, lest he do any physical damage to the already injured man. When it came to his dear, disturbed brother, Thor often let his emotions get the best of him.

"I would have words with you, Stark." Thor boomed into the small hospital room, making Pepper jump and drop the tablet she was working on. Tony simply stretched (as much as he could without pain) and gestured for Thor to speak. "Alone." Thor looked at Pepper, trying not to be too forceful, but she fled the room in a hurry.

"Thor, seriously, I don't know what you want, but I'm really tired, so I would appreciate it if you could just go fly around the block for a while so I can nap. Pepper's making me work since I'm bed ridden, and-"

"Stark, this is important. Stop your mindless chatter and listen." For once, Tony was silent. "I just witnessed my brother leaving your tower with his possessions packed in a bag. He was deeply upset. What have you done?" Stark looked nonplussed.

"I don't know what you're talking about. He was here a few hours ago, when I fell asleep, and when I woke up Pepper said he'd left to go eat or something." Tony gestured at the door, where he was sure Pepper was eavesdropping from. Sure enough, she appeared in the doorway, looking guilty as hell.

"What? What is it, Pepper?" Tony's brow furrowed in concern. Pepper looked like a puppy that was waiting to be kicked. Tony waited for her to speak.

"What is it, Pepper?" Thor asked, in a gentler tone.

"Tony, I'm sorry. I needed you to get these things done, and I knew if I told you what happened you wouldn't be in a working mood. I didn't realize how upset Loki would be I-"

"WHAT HAPPENED?!" Tony shouted.

"When I came in, Loki got really angry, I guess he hadn't talked to Fury, and so he didn't know where you were, I don't know how he found you, but he was so angry, because we all knew where you were, he didn't, and no one else had tried to call him." Pepper rushed to finish, taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry Tony, I really am. But sometimes your priorities are so screwed up, and I thought Loki would come back, I figured he just needed to cool off."

"Get. Out." Tony pointed to the door, glaring at Pepper. She turned and left, looking frustrated. She may feel bad, but she didn't regret her decision. That just made Tony angrier.

"Stark, I fear that my brother may be overreacting, he has a heightened sense of betrayal, you might say." Thor spoke quietly, hoping Tony would understand how delicate the situation is.

"When you saw him leave the tower, did you talk to him? Did he say anything?" Tony rubbed a hand over his eyes as he spoke, trying to think.

"He only spoke to dismiss me. I have not seen him so angry since he was in the grasp of the Other, and I worry that- I don't know what he may do." Thor sighed and sat down, the worry over his brother exhausting him. Tony looked over to Thor, who looked so sad and tired, and he felt pity.

"Look, Thor. For once, Loki's problems are not your fault, you don't need to look so guilty. This one's on me, and I'm going to fix it. Hand me my phone." He pointed to the small device sitting on a shelf near Thor's chair. Thor handed it over, and Tony started manipulating the screen at an impressive rate. Clearly, he had a plan of some kind. Tony's words did little to ease Thor's guilt, but his action gave Thor hope, that maybe he would be able to fix this before Loki could turn to destruction, as he was wont to do. Tony paused, glancing up at the idle god of thunder.

"You can go, you're off the hook." Tony dismissed him.

"I only wish to help, please. Tell me what I can do." Thor pleaded.

"You can go get me some coffee. And not that shit they're serving in the cafeteria, find a Starbucks." Tony spared Thor another glance to make sure he was going before returning to his phone. He had already sent several texts and emails to Loki's phone, but he wasn't really expecting a response. He could only hope Loki would at least read them. Tony didn't really do the whole 'humble and apologetic' thing, but he was trying to sound like it. He really needed Loki to believe that he was sorry, even though he wasn't sure exactly what he had done yet.

_I was unconscious, for Christ's sake! How the hell am I supposed to control what people do! _Tony thought. Instead of that he typed:

**Loki, please read this. I'm sorry you found out the way you did, you know I wouldn't have let that happen normally. Just come back. Please. **

And sent the text. He sent a few other short messages, all saying something similar, and then decided to go ahead and call him. Couldn't hurt, right? Tony was expecting to leave a voicemail that would probably get deleted before it was listened to, but was surprised to hear Loki's voice when he answered.

"Yes?" Loki answered curtly. Tony was caught off guard, and his response got lost. "Did you just call to breath at me, or were you planning on speaking?" Loki questioned irritably.

"No, I mean yes, I'm going to speak, I just didn't think you would answer. Loki, what the fuck happened? Where are you?" Tony realized how desperately he wanted Loki here with him, after hearing his voice. Even when he was angry Tony found him irresistible.

"Tony, if I wanted you to know where I was, I would tell you. Now what is it you called to say, my patience is gone for the day."

"I'm really sorry, Pepper said you were pissed, and Thor said you were pissed, and I just don't really understand what happened, but whatever it is, I'm sorry. Please come back."

"You don't even know why I'm angry, yet you call to apologize? How unusual." Loki sounded slightly amused, which Tony took to be a good sign.

"Well, let's just say I know you think it's my fault, and I'm willing to live with that."

"Hm. Not completely what I hoped to hear, but I suppose it will suffice. Tell me Tony, why is it that when you are gravely injured and hospitalized, your colleagues, teammates, even Ms. Potts know but not myself? Did you not think I would care?" Loki's voice was steady, but the pitch was rising as his emotions surfaced.

"Loki, I don't know, okay? The hospital must have contacted SHIELD first, so I guess they decided keeping it secret was more important, and Pep said Fury called you! Next time I'll make sure Jarvis is notified, and that way he can let you know wherever you are." Tony tried to sound comforting. It wasn't his gift.

"Next time." Loki scoffed. "Planning on getting into lots of these little scrapes, are you?"

"Loki, you know me, you know I like to take risks and do stupid, even reckless shit, that's not going to change. I don't know what you want here."

"What I want, Tony, is for you to care about me, for you to care how I feel when you do those stupid, reckless things. I want you to realize what it feels like to find you laying a hospital bed, broken, and then to find out that all your friends already knew!"

"Well I don't know what that feels like, okay? And I'm sorry, but Pepper said Fury did call, what more do you want, it's not my fault you didn't pick up the damn phone!" Tony was trying his hardest to remain calm. "Look- Loki, I'm sorry. I really am. I'll make sure SHIELD knows to contact you first _if _this happens again. Can you please come back so we can talk about this?"

"No. I need time to think. And so do you. If I come back, I want you to decide whether or not you're truly invested in this relationship. I will not tolerate being treated like this."

"Loki, that's not fair! I'm trying here, I really am!" At this moment, Thor strolled back in with coffee and donuts. He set the coffee down and pulled the donut he was eating out of his mouth, reaching for the phone.

"Is that Loki? Let me speak to him!" Tony shook his head and pushed Thor's hand away, but Thor was quicker. He grabbed Tony's wrist and grabbed the phone with his other hand, dropping the donut on the floor. Tony grabbed the coffee and sat back in his bed, pouting.

"Loki! It is Thor-" Tony heard a buzzing on the other end, and it sounded like Thor was getting an earful. "Yes, I understand, I will do what I can." A pause, as Loki spoke again. "Of course, brother." Another pause. "Loki, you _are_- whether or not-" Thor pulled the phone away from his ear, looking at it like it bit him. "He terminated the call." He stated, handing the phone back to Tony.

"Great. Now what am I supposed to do?" Tony grabbed a donut and started chewing.

"Loki has told me that you have not treated him with the proper respect." Thor's tone grew serious. "That is not a mistake I will allow you to repeat." Tony looked at Thor in surprise.

"Really? You who allowed him to be bullied his whole life are gonna lecture me about respecting him? Yeah, I don't think so. You don't have a leg to stand on, my friend."

"What's done is done, and I will not allow you to repeat my mistakes. I may not have treated Loki fairly, but that does not give you the right to treat him like a worthless whore, like you have all your other consorts. You will learn to respect him, any way necessary." Tony bit back a retort, and swallowed. Thor was towering over him now, looking incredibly threatening.

"Okay, so you won't stand for me being an ass to Loki, got it."

"Oh, but it is more than that. My brother may think you will learn well enough on your own, but I will ensure that you will learn this lesson thoroughly. First, you must rest and heal so that you will be allowed to leave this place."

With that, Thor nodded to Tony, and left. Tony slumped back into the pillows. _What the fuck was that about? More importantly, what the fuck am I gonna do now?_ Tony was worried about Thor, yes. But Thor was a softie at heart and Tony knew he could handle it. He was worried about Loki, but he couldn't handle the thought of Loki not coming back. He had to. In the meantime, however, Tony was stuck in this hospital room with no one to distract him. _Shit._


	6. Chapter 6

Hey guys, sorry for the delay on this chapter. I'm feeling particularly uninspired lately. Hopefully this chapter isn't shit, but it seems like it to me. I'm sorry, please forgive me. Also, if you have any ideas or suggestions on how this story should go from here, please feel free to leave them in a review! I always love to hear from you all, so even if you just want to say that you don't like the way this story has turned out, let me know! I'm always looking for constructive feedback. As always, you are dears for reading this, and I love you all.

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Loki hated asking Thor for help, but he was too angry to deal with Tony at the moment. If he tried to talk to Tony right now, the idiot would probably end up back in the hospital. For a genius, he could be incredibly dumb. Loki sighed and reclined on the uncomfortable hotel bed. He really hadn't thought about where he was going to go when he left the tower, and he had ended up in a cheap motel somewhere in Maryland. Luckily, Tony had given him a credit card, to which Loki was charging all of his expenses, because why not? Spending Tony's money was satisfying, but it wasn't making him feel any better. He grimaced as he thought about what he had said to Tony on the phone. He had sounded like a sentimental idiot. The two of them never really discussed serious emotional issues, and for good reason. Neither of them liked to talk about it, and it was way too complicated to even begin to tackle the implications of their 'relationship'. They had made it so far without any terrible consequences, but it seemed that they had reached a turning point. Tony had shown how little he cared, and Loki realized how much he did. It hurt, knowing that he was more invested in this relationship than his partner, and he didn't know how to deal with it. This is why he avoided serious relationships. This was never meant to become serious in the first place. It had started as just stress relief for the both of them. They were two high strung individuals, and a little physical release went a long way to help their mental stability. It just so happened that they also enjoyed each other's company outside the bedroom, as well. Loki had never meant to grow attached to the mortal, because of the long term issues with that , and now it would seem he was stuck. He didn't want these feelings, but now they were there, and worse, Tony knew about them because Loki had to go and get angry and speak his mind. And now Thor was involved, which only ever made things worse.

Loki's thoughts kept chasing through his mind, endlessly circling around to the hopelessness he felt when he thought of Tony leaving him. It was a possibility, and not one that Loki wanted to face. He had briefly considered ending the relationship himself, to rid himself of this burden before it got any worse, but he quickly realized he was in far too deep for that. He had let himself be vulnerable with another being, and now he was suffering for it.

The next few days were spent lounging around the crappy hotel room, only leaving to find food. Loki had a laptop with him, and he browsed the internet to pass the time, but his thoughts always distracted him. He was profoundly bored, but his anxiety at facing Tony prevented him from returning. He wasn't sure if he would ever feel ready to deal with his issues, but he could at least wait a while longer. Putting it off seemed like the better option at this point.

~Meanwhile~

Tony was released from the hospital after two agonizingly long days. The doctors wanted to keep him longer, but he had annoyed the hospital staff enough that they let him go. He was wheeled out of the hospital with a big, ugly white cast on his leg, and bandages covering enough of his face to hide from paparazzi. Not that they knew where he was, but better to hide just in case. Pepper did not want to explain this one to the press. Pepper had been a constant at Tony's side in the hospital, and he was grateful to her for that. Yes, she was happy that he was actually doing work for once, but it was more than that. Pepper knew Tony the best, and she knew how freaked out he really was by Loki's abrupt departure. She also was there to bring him back to the tower, because she knew coming home would be a big, painful reminder that Loki was gone. After living together for months, Tony was sure to feel his absence strongly.

Once they had gotten up to the penthouse, Tony immediately settled into the couch and turned on the TV. It didn't really matter what was on, he just needed a distraction. Pepper hovered in the background for a while, tidying up the kitchen that wasn't messy, and generally being a busy-body. Eventually, Tony muted the TV and turned to her.

"You don't have to stick around, you know. I can manage to keep off my leg, I promise."

"I don't believe you will, but there's nothing I can do about it." She replied, coming to sit down on the couch next to him.

"Pep, listen. I'm going to be fine. Loki will call, and when he does I'll be contrite and sincere, and it will all work out. You don't have to hover." He was trying to be gentle, to show that he really was glad for her concern, but still annoyed at her lingering.

"Tony, I know how much this is bothering you and I just wanted to say-"

"Don't. Please don't."

"-that you two will get through this."

"Pepper please, can we not talk about this?"

"I think you need to talk about it, because what are you gonna say when he does call?"

"I don't know, I'll think of something. I always do." Tony flashed a grin at her, hoping his overconfidence would convince her to leave him alone with his alcohol. He had gone without a drink for his hospital stint, and right now the only thing he wanted other than to talk to Loki, was a good, strong drink. Pepper sighed.

"You always were too stubborn for your own good. Fine. You don't want to talk about it."

"Damn right."

"So you just want me to leave you here, alone with your thoughts? You're just going to sit here feeling sorry for yourself, and we both know how destructive you are when you get like that."

"Pep, please." Tony used his best sad puppy eyes on her, and apparently it worked. She stood and gathered her bag from the counter, turning to offer one last piece of advice before she left.

"I'm going, but before you get stupid drunk and blow something up-" Tony tried to deny it but she cut him off, "just think about how Loki is feeling. Just try. I know you have it in you to be a good boyfriend, I've seen it. I think you'll find it's worth the effort." With that, she entered the elevator and left Tony alone. Finally. He closed his eyes and leaned back into the couch. 'What am I gonna do?' He thought. About Loki, about his stupid, reckless behavior, about his company, about any of it. But instead of trying to think up any solutions, he hobbled over to the bar to pour himself a drink. No point trying to put off the inevitable. The sooner he started drinking, the sooner he would pass out, and the doctor said he needed rest, right? He tried not to think about the hangover he would be facing tomorrow, or the long, empty day ahead of him with nothing to distract him. Maybe he would start drinking in the mornings. That sounded like a good plan. Actually, he'd done it before, so why not do it again. This was as good a reason as he'd ever get, or so he thought.

Unfortunately for Tony, he wasn't given the following day off. Thor showed up, bright and early, to torture him. At least, that's how it felt to Tony, what with the hangover, and having to deal with his pissed-off boyfriend's pissed-off brother. Thor, for his part, had once again left his hammer at home, for which Tony would have been grateful, if he'd thought about it. At the moment, he was more concerned with his pounding headache, and the fact that Thor seemed determined to make it worse by shouting and stomping around.

"Tony, I need to talk with you about this. I know you do not wish me to get involved, but Loki has been hurt by you, and he has asked me to make you understand that." Tony groaned into the coffee mug he was clutching.

"Can we not? I feel like I've already paid for it with this hangover, so can we skip the pep talk and you report back to the offended one that I'm humbly apologetic?"

"Tony, I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing this for Loki, because he deserves better than this treatment. I know how you feel about the way I have treated him, but there is much you don't understand. Loki and I have centuries of history, and believe me when I tell you, there is more to it than what Loki has told you." Thor settled into the chair across from Tony in the living room. Tony in turn settled deeper into his chair, trying to disappear into the cushions. "Loki has hurt me as much as I have hurt him, and despite how he interprets it, I do know how he feels about the way he was treated. I don't know how to make it right, I don't know how to make him understand that I will always care for him, and he will always be my brother. What I do know is that he cares for you, Tony, and he has been deeply hurt by your carelessness towards him."

"Carelessness? I take every opportunity to show him what he means to me, I buy him flowers, I cook for him, all that romantic crap! And how is it my fault I got into a car accident and was unconscious so I couldn't call him? I don't understand why he has to be so dramatic. Honestly!" Tony spoke angrily, but Thor didn't react.

"You need to make this right. Loki feels that you have wronged him, and he will not return to you unless you show him that you understand, and are willing to make it right. He tends to take personal offenses very seriously."

"I know that." Tony grumbled.

"Well then you know that if you don't make this right, he will never forgive you, and he has always been one to hold a grudge. And I, though I may not be an exemplary older brother, will stand with him on this, and you will regret having hurt my brother." Thor continued seriously. Tony tried to laugh it off, he really did, but Thor is an incredibly intimidating individual. After a long uncomfortable silence, Tony gave in and sighed.

"Alright, tell me how to make this right. I will do it." Tony said, sitting forward in his chair. Thor smiled briefly, enjoying having won an argument with the famously quick-witted Tony Stark. Tony blamed his hangover for the lack of his usual comebacks.

"Well, to be honest," Thor was hesitating now, searching for the right words, "I don't know what you can do to make this right. I have only been on Loki's bad side as his brother, and he always comes around eventually, if I show that I'm truly remorseful. Your relationship is more complicated, and I'm not sure if being sorry is going to be enough to ease his anger."

"Great." Tony scoffed.

"What I mean is, words alone will not be enough. You need to show him, through your actions, that you are committed to him, and that you will not hurt him in this same way again. Tony, you must try, I do not wish to see my brother be this hurt by one of my friends, not again."

"Again?" Tony looked at Thor in confusion and shock. 'When had Loki dated one of Thor's friends? Nevermind, not important.' Tony thought as he shook his head.

"It is not of any importance. What does matter is that you show Loki that you truly care, and you will not let this happen again. He does not trust easily, and you have broken his trust once. You must work to earn it back. I do not know how long it will take for him to return, nor how long it will be before he trusts you again, once he does return."

"Well, that's very helpful, thanks." Tony said, voice dripping with sarcasm. Thor was getting better at recognizing it, unfortunately.

"You asked me to help you, and that is what I'm trying to do. It is a difficult thing, to understand and predict Loki's behavior. I'm doing this because I know he cares for you, and I will do what I must to see him happy. Now you must do your best to make him happy, or I will make you understand the depth of your error." Thor was using his threatening tone again. Tony was beginning to wonder if the guy was a little bi-polar, the way he switched back and forth between angry and not. Then again, Loki had always said that Thor's temper was one of his strongest, and worst, traits.

"Alright, I get it. I fucked up, I need to fix it. I'll try, buddy, I really will. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some very important romantic plans to make." Tony stood and gestured for the door, hoping that Thor had gotten his fill of lecturing for the day. Thor nodded gravely, and walked to the elevator.

"Good luck, Tony. I am not very knowledgable in affairs of the heart, but I believe that you will do the right thing. If you truly care for Loki, and I believe you do, the answer will come to you."

"Thanks, Thor. I hope you're right." Tony agreed, seriously for once.

After Thor was gone, Tony went straight to his lab. He always thought best when he was working with his hands on some mindless task, and he really needed to think right now. He needed an excellent plan to get Loki to come back, forgive him, and start to trust him again. Sweeping romantic gestures, while not Tony's strength, were something he had accepted as a necessity when he was with Pepper, because he was constantly fucking up. Now again, with Loki, he was learning the fine art of the grand gesture as an apology. It just seemed that his mistakes were getting larger, and his romantics acts, in turn, had to be more and more impressive. He really needed to outdo himself this time. So he set to work on fine-tuning his suit, which always needed doing but didn't require much thought, so his mind could focus on ways to get back on Loki's good side.


	7. Chapter 7

Bonjour! Hi friends, I feel bad. This chapter is mushy and angsty and I don't like it, but they needed to sit down and talk. One of my lovely reviewers was confused as to why Loki was so angry, and I did address that in this chapter, but I just want to clear it up in case anyone else was confused. Loki is mad that Tony didn't list him as an 'emergency contact', more or less, but also because Tony is still engaging in reckless and dangerous behavior, like the idiot he is. Loki loves mischief, but fragile mortals shouldn't drive like morons when they belong to a god. If that makes sense.

Also, I officially cannot write fluffy kissing scenes. The end of this chapter gets really, really cheesy, and I'm sorry. I though about making it a little smutty, but it's already a long chapter (for me and this story), and I didn't want to go into it. There's enough other stuff in this chapter, I feel like it would have been a bit much. So cheesy and stupid it is. If you want another chapter of fluff, smut, and happy endings, I would be happy to try; please just review and tell me so, otherwise this is the end!

Also also, thank you thank you thank you to all of you who read this story, but especially those of you who favorited, followed, and reviewed! We are now best friends, no takesies backsies.

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Loki made it two weeks without talking to Tony again. He had vacillated between going back to the tower or running away and never talking to him again. In the end, he was driven back by a combination of boredom and desire to yell at Tony. He knew he would probably forgive the idiot, but not before he stressed his objections to Tony's manner of handling emotional things. If this relationship (he had given up avoiding the word to describe their liason, it was a relationship, no matter what either of them claimed) was going to continue, they were both going to have to deal with their emotional avoidance issues, and just talk honestly to one another. Easier said than done, in both cases.

When he finally gave in, he checked out of the horrible motel, and arrived back at the tower in the late afternoon. He hadn't told anyone he was returning, but as he walked through the front doors into the lobby, he was reconsidering his decision. Perhaps he should have told someone, if only to ensure that he would be able to avoid Thor. He was also a little worried about what Thor had done to Tony. Thor was overprotective to begin with, and Loki had gone and asked for his help. A miscalculation in a moment of weakness, no doubt. He made it to the elevator with no sign of the little band of heroes. As the elevator rose to the upper floors, Loki began to wonder what state Tony would be in. As he figured, there were two options. 1, Tony had basically drunk himself into a coma, and he would be either incoherent or unconscious. 2, Tony would be locked in his lab, working on some new project or suit upgrade, and would be dirty and unfed, as Tony refused to properly look after himself. Either way, Loki would have to get Tony clean and rested before they could sit and talk seriously. Which was good, really, because Loki still hadn't decided what he wanted to say. Master of words though he was, he was counting on his feelings to come out clearly when he was face to face with the root of his emotional problems (and happiness).

The doors dinged softly and opened into Tony's penthouse apartment. Loki stepped out calmly, bracing himself for whatever he was about to find. There was nothing. Loki looked around the living area, the kitchen, and the bedroom to find nothing. So that left the second option. Loki went back to the elevator, heading to the lab. When he got there, he was once again confronted with a distinct lack of Tony. Where else could he be? He could have gone drinking in public, but Tony had to be more careful of his public image lately, so hopefully he hadn't sunk to that level. He could also be out in another fight for SHEILD. Loki's chest tightened at the thought. As much as he knew Tony could look out for himself, it was still stressful to have a partner who was constantly out risking their lives. And Tony had just been in a near fatal accident. And Tony was under emotional stress, or at least he better be or he'll be in another near fatal accident. Loki took a deep breath and reminded himself that Tony would still be recovering, and even SHEILD, who held so little regard for Tony's life, wouldn't let him fly around in his suit in that condition.

Loki headed to the floor where the other members of the avengers resided when they were in New York, to see if there was anyone there to tell him where Tony went. Mentally crossing his fingers that he wouldn't have to see Thor, Loki stepped out of the elevator for a third time. At first, he was once again disappointed. After looking around briefly, he discerned the sound of voices, coming from one of the bedrooms. Loki drifted over silently, hovering just outside the door to listen in. As he suspected, his relationship with Tony was being discussed. He was surprised to hear Bruce's voice.

"I don't know when Loki's coming back, but I know he will. Eventually. He is the type to hold a grudge, though." Bruce's voice came through the door, slightly muffled. Someone responded briefly, but Loki couldn't make out if it was a word or just a grunt.

"Loki was never one to hide a grudge." Thor chimed in, his very voice grating on Loki's nerves. "He will return soon, I have faith. If only to remind us all how angry he is. I'm sorry, Tony. He was never easy to deal with." This time, Loki did hear Tony's reply. He was surprised to hear his lover's voice here, and even more surprised that he sounded clear headed and sober, if not genuinely upset.

"Well I'm not easy to deal with either, and I know that. It doesn't mean that I know how to make this right. I mean, it was a stupid little mistake! So I forgot to sign a piece of paper that tells the doctor to call _him _when something happens, it's not like I purposely tried to keep him from being there!"

"Tony, this isn't productive." Bruce scolded. "You need to focus on how Loki feels about it, and what you're going to do to apologize, not on how it happened in the first place."

"I agree. While it may not have been an intentional slight, my brother is more susceptible to the feeling of betrayal than most-" Loki scoffed at Thor, the sentimental fool, "and trying to place the blame elsewhere will do no good."

"UGH! This is stupid! I'm an idiot, I've accepted this about myself. Why can't everyone else just realize it and deal with the fact that I'm going to screw up! I'm so sick of thinking about this." Tony ranted. Loki decided he was done eavesdropping, and knocked sharply on the door. The voices fell silent, and he heard footsteps approach the door. It opened to reveal Bruce, whose face immediately broke into an expression of relief.

"Ah, perfect timing. Tony, it's for you." Bruce said. Tony leaned in his chair so he could see around Bruce's shoulder out the door. The instant he recognized Loki's tall frame, he leapt from his chair and practically tackled the taller man. Loki stumbled under Tony's enthusiastic embrace, but managed not to fall. Tony had to lean heavily on him for balance, as he was still unsteady on his walking cast.

"Loki! Ohmygod I'm so glad it's you! I mean, of course it's you, but I'm so glad you're here! I've been waiting to see you, and talk to you, and GOD I'm just so fucking ecstatic you're back." Tony paused for breath as Loki pushed Tony's arms off of his shoulders.

"Tony. I'm glad to see you're sober. We need to talk." Loki replied calmly, avoiding looking into Tony's eyes. Tony turned to wave to Bruce and Thor, departing with a quick, 'thanks' before turning and leading Loki back to the elevator. They ascended to Tony's floor in tense silence, punctuated by Tony's nervous fidgeting. Instead of being annoyed, as Loki was at first by this incessant habit, Loki found himself welcoming the familiar sound of Tony's movement. It felt like coming home, the last two weeks had been so silent without Tony's constant talking and shifting, and Loki realized with a slight shock how _much _he had missed his annoying genius. Well, that quickly resolved which direction this talk was going to take. It was not an option for this to be goodbye, then. At least, not for Loki.

Tony, not realizing Loki's epiphany in the last ten seconds, began his bumbling, wordy apology the instant the elevator doors signaled their arrival at the top floor.

"I'm sorry. I don't really know how it managed to slip my mind, but I know I should have done something to make sure that if something happened to me, you would get more than just a message from Fury, and I know a genius like me should be able to remember these things, so I'm sorry for that. I just don't think about these things. It's not that I don't think about you, believe me, I think about you more often than is healthy. But-" Tony paused for breath, "that's besides the point. The point is that I betrayed you, sort of. I didn't return the trust you gave me, not completely, and as a result you were left to deal with Fury, and Pepper. God, I'm so mad at Pepper I can't even tell you. But I take full responsibility for that as well. She was rude to you, and I guess that's my fault for not making it clear to her, as well as everyone else, how much you mean to me. How important you are to me, they need to see that. Which brings me to my next point. You are very fucking important to me. Sorry for the expletive, but I need it to express the, I don't know, depth of my feelings-" Tony physically cringed at the word, at which point Loki took some pity on the man, but also wanted to end this speech that was bordering on word vomit. Clearly, he should not have left Tony to stew on his apology for this long. The result was an absolute mess, and Loki had to resist rolling his eyes. He put up an elegant hand, not rudely, to stop Tony's words. He made sure Tony was done, then walked over to the couch to sit down. This felt like it was going to be a long conversation, and that required sitting down. Tony followed like a limping puppy, waiting to be yelled at. Tony sat, and opened his mouth like he was about to start in again with his apology. Before he could, Loki spoke.

"And for recklessly endangering your life, are you going to apologize for that? This is more about you than about how your friends see us." Loki stated sharply. He wasn't going to forgive easily.

"That's- I- that's-" Tony ran a hand through his hair as he struggled for words. "That's what I do, Loki! I'm reckless and dangerous, and I do stupid shit! I've never apologized for being myself."

"So it doesn't concern you how I feel when you are needlessly hurt. It's bad enough, Tony, that I have to sit and worry about you when you risk your life for noble, but stupid reasons like SHIELD. Now I have to worry that you're going to go out and try to kill yourself just for some adrenaline rush? That's more than is fair, and that's more than I will tolerate. I'm not asking you to change who you are, but I am going to ask that you focus your attention outside of yourself for one brief moment to consider how your actions impact others." Loki spoke quietly but clearly. Tony felt the powerful emotion behind Loki's words. It was more than he had been expecting. He was beginning to see how deep the god's attachment went. And it was more than Tony knew how to deal with, but being out of his emotional depth was nothing new.

"Oh." Was Tony's underwhelming response. He thought for a moment. Knowing Loki cared for him was one thing. Knowing Loki _loved _him, for that's what this was, wasn't it? Knowing that, gave Tony pause. He hadn't even let himself think that Loki could feel that way, because if he had been wrong, it would have been to painful. If he had thought sooner that Loki loved him, then he would have admitted to himself that he returned those feelings. And that was just begging to get hurt. Tony was not experienced in these matters, but he knew enough that he was afraid of them. He didn't want to think about it, not to mention how he actively avoided talking about it. Now it seemed, Loki was determined to drag Tony into talking about it. Damn.

Loki cleared his throat, impatiently waiting for Tony's response.

"I mean, no one ever plans to get hurt, and no matter how reckless I may be I'm never _expecting_ for anything to go wrong, but when you put it that way. Loki, I'm so sorry for hurting you. I didn't realize, not until this moment, how selfish I've been. I guess I just assumed everyone else is as selfish as me, and so I figured you didn't really feel that way about me, so I didn't think my bad decisions would affect you this much. I thought you were just in this for fun." Loki looked offended at Tony's words.

"You think I live with you, put up with your annoying habits, tolerate your constant talking, and generally show you affection for _fun_? Tony, this is so much more than that. How could possibly not have realized this? You obviously have been mislabeled as a 'genius'." Loki tried to dispel the tension in the room with his quip, but his tense posture revealed his stress. Tony was momentarily distracted, wanting nothing more than to rub the tension _out _of those broad, pale shoulders. But no, they were trying to have a serious discussion.

"Loki, I hadn't thought about it, ok? I generally try to avoid thinking about these things, because if I really think about it, there's no reason at all for you to be here. I have nothing to offer you." Tony rubbed a hand across his exhausted eyes. "I don't know why you've stuck around this long, I'm such a massive screw-up, and I can't do anything right, especially when it comes to relationships, and I never expected this to evolve into that. I'm so sorry for wasting your time. I won't be bothering you any more." Tony finished and hung his head in his hands, waiting for Loki to leave. It's what always happened. Tony screwed up one too many times, and apologizing just wouldn't be enough this time. He had tried to think of something more, some action to take to express his regret, but Loki just didn't seem like the kind of person, god, or whatever that could be swept off of his feet by a romantic dinner or brand new car. So he braced himself for Loki's dismissal, knowing now that was the only way this discussion could end. He felt the familiar hopelessness and depression settling in, and he had a brief moment to wonder if he would survive his own guilt this time when he tried to drown his sorrows, before his thoughts were interrupted by a hand on his shoulder. Tony jumped involuntarily, not having heard Loki shift from his spot on one couch next to Tony on the other.

"Tony…" Loki spoke softly, starting to run his hand across Tony's shoulders. "Tony you think I'm going to leave you? You're so much more to me than you realize. Yes, I'm upset with you for your behavior, but not because I don't want to stay. Tony, I just need you to be _here, _with me, and not out trying to destroy yourself." Loki sighed and let his hand fall back into his lap. "Although, if you want me to go, I will. I can't force you to do anything. If you don't feel the same as me, then there is no reason for me to stay." Tony stared at Loki, still waiting for the blow that wasn't going to come. He hesitated, for it took a moment for Loki's words to truly sink in.

"Loki, I don't want you to leave. Ever. I'm pretty sure I love you." Tony said it before he could rethink it. It was out. He felt more vulnerable than he could ever remember feeling, and it hurt. Loki looked shocked for a beat before he leaned in and pressed his lips softly to Tony's.

"I love you, too. You foolish man." Loki replied. Tony took a deep, trembling breath, hardly believing that this could be true. He had only just realized his feelings for the man, and it had been monumentally weak to admit them, but for Loki to return them? Absolutely incredibly, and way more than Tony could deal with. Instead of thinking of another witty reply or apology, Tony opted to physically express his feelings on the matter. Reaching up to grip Loki's neck, he pulled their mouths back together for a longer, deeper, wetter kiss. They stayed locked together, lips moving together passionately, until they were both panting. Tony leaned back onto the couch, pulling Loki down with him, until they were lying on the couch, the taller man on top. They stopped for a moment to look deeply into each other's eyes, but instead of more emotional admissions, they returned to the kiss, the heat of lust beginning to grow between them.


	8. Chapter 8

Hi all! Yes, I'm still alive, and I'm sorry! So here's the smut. I rated this story M, and so I felt I needed to include it. This is my first time letting anyone else read something like this I've written, so I would especially appreciate comments and reviews of the smut! Let me know what you think, if it works for you, whatever! I'm working on a big story, and I can't decide if I want to include the sex or not. So this will be my deciding factor. Please help me make up my mind! Thanks again for reading, and especially to those of you who've favorited, followed, and reviewed, you are all amazing!

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The next few days were full to the brink of sex, and not much else. Tony, for possibly the first time _ever_, thought it might be a good idea for them to talk about stuff. And Tony doesn't talk about feelings, with anyone. However, every single time he tried to discuss it with Loki, the evil bastard would distract him with sex. Fortunately for Loki, this was a very effective strategy. This pattern continued one morning when they were in Tony's room, Tony trying to find the right suit for a board meeting, and Loki just antagonizing him with rude comments. Tony was standing his closet, wearing only a towel, as he pulled a suit from the rack to wear.

"Not that one, you look like a dwarf." Loki mocked, causing Tony to toss the suit he'd chosen into the corner.

"Well, why don't you pick one then?" He gestured to his massive closet.

"Gladly." Loki stood and stalked to the closet, dragging his fingertips across the expensive fabrics. "I think…I prefer you naked." He turned back to Tony, ripping the towel from Tony's waist, leaving him in just that state.

"Loki, I-" Tony's words were stopped by Loki's lips. Loki gently brushed his lips against the shorter man's, and then tried to straighten up, but Tony was faster. He wrapped his hands in the black locks, roughly jerking Loki's lips back to his. He deepened the kiss, opening his mouth and forcing his tongue into Loki's mouth.

Loki moaned into the kiss, welcoming the intrusion. He reached his hand to Tony's hip, grinding their hips together. He stepped forward, forcing Tony backwards until his knees hit the edge of the bed, and the two men fell onto the soft mattress, their limbs tangling together. The kiss was broken but Loki wasted no time in directing his attentions to Tony's neck, causing him to release a sigh, that turned into a moan as Loki started to lick his way across the tan skin.

Before he could get too distracted by his lust, Loki quickly removed his shirt, slipping it over his head and tossing it aside. Tony's hands were on his skin immediately, exploring the pale chest and caressing the toned muscles he found there. Loki grabbed Tony's wrists and pulled them over his head, holding both with one of his hands, and using his free hand to pinch a nipple.

Tony moaned and writhed with the sensations, but needed more. Using his legs, he flipped Loki onto his back and planted his knees between the taller man's legs, forcing Loki's legs apart. Once Loki released his wrists, he stripped Loki of his pants, quickly removing them and discarding them. Loki chuckled at his impatience.

"In a hurry, are we?" Loki asked, his voice deepened with lust. Tony growled in response and took one of Loki's nipples into his mouth, causing Loki's back to arch into the sensation. Words of sex and lust were pouring from Loki's mouth, spurring Tony on even more. He moved to the other side, nibbling and licking until it was stiff and hard. Then he sat back to admire his work, and Loki moaned in protest. Tony ran a finger softly along Loki's erection, teasingly.

"Weren't you just complaining I was in too much of a hurry?" Tony whispered, leaning forward to kiss Loki again.

Loki quickly rolled them, so he was on top, straddling Tony's legs and attacking Tony's mouth. He grabbed Tony's cock, stroking it slowly, while his other hand grabbed the lube. He leaned back to coat his fingers, then kissed Tony as he pushed a finger in. Tony groaned into the kiss, he loved it when Loki took control like this. Loki stroked more fingers in, preparing him quickly. Tony ran his nails down Loki's back, leaving red lines across his lover's back.

Once Tony was practically begging for Loki to fuck him, Loki pulled his fingers out. He quickly lubed up his cock and lined himself up with Tony's entrance. He bit Tony's neck as he slid in slowly, enjoying the sensation of Tony around him, so tight and hot. Once he was all the way in, he held it for a second, kissing Tony again.

"I love you, Anthony." Loki murmured into Tony's ear.

"I love you too, now fuck me already!" Was the reply. This was not the moment he wanted to discuss anything.

Loki just laughed and started rutting into Tony at a brutal pace, shaking the bed frame. The sound of their grunts and moans almost drowned out the thud of the bed hitting the wall. Loki thrust into him for a while, until he felt his climax start to build. He didn't want this to be over so quickly, so he pulled out, ordering Tony to turn over. Tony complied, pulling his knees up underneath him so he was kneeling with his face pressed into the pillows. Loki quickly re-entered him, gliding in and out a few times to find the right angle.

"Oh! Loki, god yes!" Tony cried when Loki found that spot.

Satisfied, Loki grabbed Tony's hips and pounded that spot over and over, reducing Tony to single-syllable shouts of ecstasy. Before long, Loki felt the pleasure building again, and he couldn't stop himself this time.

"Touch yourself, Stark. I want you to cum at the same time I do." He commanded. Tony gripped his neglected prick without hesitation, stroking himself in rhythm with Loki's thrusts. Loki refocused on the sound of Tony's cries, and increased his pace. He couldn't stop now, and he was plowing into him, picking up speed as he neared his climax. "Now Tony!" Loki cried as his orgasm hit him. He heard Tony gasp as he spilled into him. Tony cursed into the pillow, stroking himself through his orgasm and Loki thrust the last few times, before pulling out.

Loki ran his hand across Tony's back, leaning forward to kiss the hot, damp skin. Tony collapsed into the bed, spent. Loki lay next to him, closing his eyes and enjoying the post-orgasmic haze.

"I think I'm going to have to call in sick to that meeting." Tony mumbled into the pillow. Loki just sighed in response.


End file.
